i’m ba’ack (sort of)

knee surgery. ah, the fun. it’s astonishing, really, that after a whole day ordeal, i am left with three bandaids. no lie. three. little. bandaids. they had to do general anesthesia on me (a first for me) because they didn’t have an up-to-date platelet count and the gas-passer didn’t want a bleeder on his hands should he have chosen a spinal instead. i woke up poorly from general, very cold and thrashing about. the nurse said she was trying to understand what i was saying; i’m grateful she could not or else they probably would have put some ivory soap in my mouth. i was quite hungry, so i had some crackers and cranberry juice, which now leads me to another first that day: throwing up on my front lawn. thank goodness it was undigested stuff. maybe it will help the plants.

ah, the glamor of being so dependent. i hate it.

i also have the pic-a-nic basket of fun, AKA my magical cooler that keeps my knee from hurting. see, you fill it up with ice and water, wrap the pad around your knee, and VOILA! joy reigneth. skwigg put it best: you feel like a (non)walking aquarium. jools wanted to fill it up with food and toys. that would have been an experience, though while on percocet, i probably wouldn’t have cared. much. (unfortunately, no one checked to see that it was actually ON when they put it on my knee after surgery. i asked BS, “why doesn’t it feel cold?” he said, “well, maybe you’re numb?” three hours later, when they were letting me out, i asked the nurse the same question. she said, “oh, no, it hasn’t been ON?” yep. i missed three hours of chilling goodness post surgery. oh well. spilled milk.

anyway, i can put some weight on my foot now. i am working on bending my knee and not screaming simultaneously. today, i am going to try two very exciting things. one is a shower. (i have not showered since tuesday morning, and, in short, i smell like a bus.) the next thing i’m going to try are STAIRS. yes. i want to see my room, my bathroom, my clean clothes for the first time in days. i can’t wait.

because i believe in maximizing my angst, i visited the hematologist as well as the physical therapist yesterday. my platelets are down a little (185) but not in a scary place. the problem is, now that i need IVIG, they can’t seem to find any. if anyone out there knows where i might start scoring some IVIG, let me know. apparently, area hospitals have none 😦

the physical therapist is a hoot. she put me in something called GAME READY that essentially squeezed the living shit out of my entire leg while cooling it down. the PT told me that it was a very expensive treatment. i wonder if they have these sorts of things in S&M parlors. i like the fact that there’s a version for horses as well, although it does seem crueler than just shooting the nags. nay.

anyway, thanks for the well wishes, the cookies, the flowers, the fruit, and all the kindness. i appreciate it more than my percocet-addled mind can express.

(and today — i am off percocet. really.)

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