pain and suffering

it is so hard to watch your child feel terrible pain and not be able to do much about it.

on monday, i got a call to come downtown and get BC. apparently, one of her teachers at school was playing a little rough with her, and in the process, really badly hurt her left arm. the details aren’t entirely clear to me, although i get upset when BC tells me that she told him to stop throwing her around – that her arm hurt – and he didn’t believe her at first.

anyway, she has been x-rayed, she saw her pediatricians twice on monday (and yes, for you trivia buffs out there, if you ever wondered, you do have to pay two co-pays if you see the doctors more than once in a day), and today she saw an orthopedic specialist. they seem to have ruled out nursemaid’s elbow, and there is no apparent break. the orthopedist wants her to come back on monday. i am guessing she has had some mighty strain or bruise, though her wrist is not really looking swollen at the moment. of course, i am not a doctor. i am just a mom. a mom with a very desperately unhappy child.

her screams!

you know the sound wolves make when they have that high-pitched yelping? then you know what BC sounds like… getting on and off the couch. getting in and out of bed. getting in and out of a car seat. lifting her hand anywhere near her tummy. basically, any movement of her left arm sends her screaming and howling. you don’t even want to know about when two pediatricians moved her arm around to see whether she had a range of motion in her arm. it was one of the ugliest moments. ever.

basically, we are giving her children’s motrin for the pain. it isn’t cutting it, but it is literally all we can do. she won’t wear a sling to immobilize her arm; frankly, she can’t even lift her arm to put it in the sling, anyway. so instead, she walks around, clutching her bad arm with her good arm. all day. she even has trouble eating because it is a struggle between balancing herself and eating with her good hand.

i know she will feel better at some point. but it kills me that there is so little i can do to make the pain go away. i’m her mom, and that’s my job, you know.

and at the moment, i feel like i am somehow failing miserably at it.

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