yesterday, we took BC to her 4-year-old well-baby visit. other than lacking confidence in her writing skills (she simply won't try to write letters except the letter i), she is on target for her age. she is nearly 40 inches tall (50% for those of you keeping track), and, miraculously, she is now weighing in at 30.5 pounds (the doctor marvelled, “hey, look, mom, your girl has moved up to the 10th percentile for weight!” for those of you familiar with our struggles with BC's size when she was a baby, you should know how comforted i am that BC is growing just right for herself – she is a tiny girl, but apparently, all is just fine. as we suspected – she is just small, but she is perfect for who she is 🙂

well, i am sure all the candy she consumes helps her with the weight 😉

but given the choice of no shots this time and 3 shots plus a TB test for next year's exam, we thought better of it and decided to give her her MMR and DPT shots this time. i knew that after BC had had one shot, we would be hard-pressed to give her a second, let alone 4 punctures in one visit. we steeled ourselves. i had prepared BC for the fact that she would be getting two shots this visit, anyhow, and had bought a little kit of Goody Hair Thingies as a present for being so brave.

she was somewhat cooperative before the first shot in her upper thigh. this, the nurse assured us, was the one that wouldn't sting. once she had the shot, though, she became hysterical. we're talking all-out, blinding fear and fury. she wanted mommy, she wanted daddy, she wanted out of there. “i am not ready, i am not ready!” she kept screaming before her second shot. she tried to dart away, she wanted to get away. and i could not blame her. shot #2 was supposed to sting a bit, and believe me, if i thought i could let her skip it, i would have. every fiber in my being was screaming. and finally, BS had to nearly restrain her, and i held her hand. she screamed when the needle went in her arm, and the look she gave me made me burst into tears (which is incredibly not helpful when you are trying to help your child be brave during a situation like this.) she looked at me like “mommy, why can't you protect me from this?” tears started pouring out of me, just as she was shrieking and screaming. i wiped them away as quickly as i could.

i will never forget that look on her face as long as i live.

BC screamed so loudly that the nurse went out and brought her back an ENTIRE CUP OF GUMMY BEARS. i have never seen my doctor's office give candy to any kid – stickers and pencils are the norm. but i think the nurse sensed that 2 pencils plus a whole bunch of Dora the Explorer stickers weren't going to cut it alone (which, they didn't.) my poor little monkey. the entire office heard her screams. anyway, we ended up taking her to friendly's for dinner and ice cream. i am sure we are setting her up to a lifetime weight battle since we are rewarding her with food. but you know, i can understand exactly why we did this, and i am not apologizing much.

BC crashed. she was sitting in my lap, telling me how she was awake now, but that she would like to go into her bed. we gave her some kiddie motrin just in case, put her in her bed, and boom! she was asleep.

my poor little bunny. she will not understand for years why we put her through that.


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